“Unfinished” Mother

A mother is never “unfinished.” No matter how brief her time was with her child, the bond of love between mother and child was complete. A mother’s love for her child is unending. Dreams may shatter and circumstances may change, but a mother’s love remains strong. As a mother travels the path to healing, it is important for her to remind herself often that she is a mother forever. Her motherhood did not stop when her child died. This understanding of motherhood releases the feelings of guilt and failure and allows a mother to begin to see herself as a whole person again — a complete mother.

~Author Unknown ~

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2 thoughts on ““Unfinished” Mother

  1. Dear Karen,
    How ironic, your entry “Unfinished Mother”!I had a “meltdown” at a shopping plaza yesterday. The Mothers Day advertising got to me,in a painful reminder that the son whose birth won me that title had vanished,and I felt half the mother I used to be, or less!”The feelings of guilt and failure”flooded me again.Six months before his death,he had spoken of plans for suicide.We tried then to get him past the pain he was in,and thought we succeeded.I know now how ineffective the help was,and even in the last 24hours,when he talked more of his despair,I did nothing significant to help.I’ll always wish I’d been a better mother to him.
    Don’t underestimate the impact of your website. So many things you and others write hit home! It is reassuring, if painful, to know one is not alone in dealing with the aftermath of the suicide of a child.Thinking of you with all the memories this month brings. Regards, Maree

  2. Maree, my heart goes out to you. Although we are constantly told not to feel guilty, it’s impossible not to. I keep going back to the week prior to losing Barry and wishing I had said and done things differently, but I can’t. It’s torture. In hindsight, everyone can find the flaws in their actions, but we are human and, at the time, we do the best we can.

    {{{hugs}}}

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