It has been 3 long months now and nothing is getting any better for me, or any of us. I just wish it was a dream, that you went over to England for a hoilday, but I know that it’s not.
Do you know that I’ve been depressed for the last 3 months and I know what you were going throw now more than I did then? My head is one big mess at the moment. I’ve been suicidal a few times too and a couple of the times very close. I think about doing it alot and I look around at things I can use. I really want to be with you, Barry, and make sure you’re OK. I miss you so much and I miss all the good and fun times we shared together. I just want you back, and do you know, sometimes, I think to myself that maybe you’re inside of me because once when I rang Mum she thought she was talking to you and it was because of me making a joke with her and you use to do that she was saying to me. When I’m with Angie she will say to me a lot that we are very alike in personality ways; the way I act and sometimes talk or move, just little things. One more thing is, I love you, Barry, and I always will. No one will ever be as good as a brother or best friend like you, and I really do mean that. You’re always in my heart.
love always big fella,
( Daniel ) xoxoxoxoxo