I don’t really like finding the good in something so tragic, because I would prefer to have Barry with me anyday. However, some good has come from Barry’s actions and I promised myself that I would be honest when writing posts for this blog so I must address this topic.
Please believe me when I say that this post is painful for me to write because I have to openly admit that relations between me and my surviving son have not always been good. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve always loved Daniel. I could never stop loving him; no matter what happens between us. But the road has been long and hard at times. Some of that journey may be addressed in another post, but I won’t discuss it now.
On 18 May 2006, Barry took something from me that I loved dearly; himself. However, he gave me something in return; he rebuilt the bridge that lead to Daniel.
His actions allowed us to reach out to each other and let go of everything in the past. We needed each other more than words can say. We look to each other for comfort of a different kind than what you can get from a partner. Barry was our blood relative. He was a part of us. And he will remain a part of us. It’s that blood that will hold me and Daniel together for all time.
I’m not really sure what I’m trying to say here, but I do know that Daniel has grown into a man. He’s matured before my eyes. I love him; always have and always will. He’s my son.