Today, Barry would have turned 19 years old. We had planned a family lunch and I thought he had planned to “party on” with his friends as well. Neither of these things will happen.
I don’t know if anyone else (apart from the immediate family) will spare a thought for Barry today. I hope so. I hope his friends raise their glasses to him. And I hope they share a few happy memories. Barry would have liked that.
So far this morning, I feel composed. With luck, that will continue throughout the day. However, being the day it is, and being his mother, I find myself thinking about the day he was born and I think today would be the ideal day to start the category “My Son”. I’ll prepare that first post when I get home from work after lunch.
Happy Birthday, Barry! I love you.
I recently lost a friend to suicide. It was tough, even though I was not family or even a close friend. I think it’s terrific what you are doing here. I will save a spot in my prayers for Barry today.
That means a lot to me. Thank you so much, Nienke.
As I closed Barry’s curtains last night, and darkness filled his room, I felt that emptiness fill me again. That emptiness that I know has come since Barry’s passing.
I looked at his ashes laying on his bed and remembered these words from Isaiah 49:15:
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget, if that be possible
I will not forget you!
. . . and nor shall we ever forget you Barry.
Not your Birthdays, not even a Christmas Day, not one single day will pass that we will forget those precious memories that you have left us to treasure you by.
Gary
Those are beautiful, heart felt words. Thank you, Gary.